Rebel

During my first year of uni I changed quite a lot. I won't go into all that now (I may at another time if I feel comfortable doing so), although a couple of people who read this might know what I'm getting at. Anyway, when I got home for the holidays and was back with my family, I changed back. Probably because it was easier to fit back in that way. It has done me no good however, and so for the past couple of weeks I have had to go back through and try to get back to where I was when I finished uni for the year. Which has resulted in me at times being very moody and selfish and unlike me, and caused considerable tension at times between me and my boyfriend. It was like I was rebelling against myself by being the exact opposite of everything I am.

However, today I put all that behind me and decided that I need to feel alive again. Because I don't experience life to the full unless I feel that way- unless I feel like me. That may not make sense to some people who read this, but it makes sense to me.

Today I also resolve to use my blog more. During times when I didn't have time to sit down and create it, let alone write anything in it, I made some scribblings about stuff I eventually wanted to blog about. So, over the next few weeks, I hope to get out those notes and try and make sense of them by blogging every day if I can.